Heart to Heal

A wise man once compared love to a thrashing floor where the hard shell around your heart is beaten until the sheath breaks away. No matter how many layers you've been through, love finds new ways to reform you each and every day. Whether it's a new crack appearing in the tough husk you didn't think you had or the chaff separating for the first time and you're trying desperately to breathe after the shock...love will reform you with each breath if you let it. 

It's not wrong to feel threatened by the change, it's your choice to allow it, but until you've touched the pain you won't have any knowledge of the joys gained with the growth in your life when you allow it. Emotions are frightening, the thought of a heart being taken to the thrashing floor of love sounds immensely painful, but life cannot have love without feelings. And pain is one of them.

To be hurt by loving could mean a number of things. It could be a dream you must let go, a trial in your relationship, a mutual loss, a betrayal, a falling away, a falling out...it could be anything you're afraid of or that one thing you overlooked...regardless of what it is, if you love it will hurt. 

But if there is one thing we can take comfort in, it's the fact that we are only human. We don't have to carry the burden of diety and angels, we can experience life as we were born into this world: human. Without unfairly judging eachother for struggles or holding a double standard. Humanity means we all have emotions and feelings, no matter how we try and deny them and to understand the emotions and feelings of others leaves our lives perhaps in more pain but richer for it. Perhaps in more confusion but deeper loved for it. No matter your situation in life; your religion; your personal struggles; or your personal achievements; never become so logical that you forget how to feel or so bitter that you can't touch the heart of others with compassion. 

The Prophet: Kahlil Gibran

On love- 

When love beckons to you, follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams
as the north wind lays waste the garden. 

For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,
So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth. 

Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.
He threshes you to make you naked.
He sifts you to free you from your husks.
He grinds you to whiteness.
He kneads you until you are pliant;
And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God's sacred feast. 

All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life's heart. 

But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure,
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor,
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love. 

When you love you should not say, "God is in my heart," but rather, "I am in the heart of God."
And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course. 

Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.

 

Gush Post- Hobby Lobby

Ok, is it just me or is the store Hobby Lobby the greatest thing ever?! I've been every week since my sister first showed me the magic not so long ago. It's a phenominal store with a phenominal business philosophy. 

I have decorated my room and office with their items and I have to say it feels more vintage than ever before. I just love the styles they have. But even moreso I love the selections and the fact they aren't afraid to be who they are- period. So props to Hobby Lobby and their amazing store! 

Book Proposals and How You Too Can Write Like A Pro!

NEWS: There is nothing worse to a writer than to have to endure the loss of a medium of communication. Since October 2014, I was up a DEEP creak without a boat or paddle. Not only did my computer crash, it killed my hard drive, fried every useful part of the computer and I lost over 50,000 words to my newest novel! The research was gone and my backup was plugged in when I got the virus and I lost that too! So needless to say the whole year ended horrible and 2015 started off amazing because I received a new laptop from a very dear friend.

Now on 2/28/15, I've caught up in work and writing. So I wanted to bring to your attention a few points about my latest project and hopefully help a few fledgling writers out. Book Proposals. That's right, I am entering the scary bigs now and have to write a winning proposal that promotes the purity and idiosyncratic nature of my work, while using math and science EEEK! Or it would be EEEK if I hadn't already know exactly what is needed.

So here is the breakdown of a decent book proposal and how I decided to go about it.  First there are two main categories, you and your book.

You:
A brief biography that highlights your skills, talents, education, and prior publications.

Your Book: a synopsis no more than two paragraphs, final estimated word count, estimated completion date, description of target audience, description and information on sales market, list of comparable and competing titles and what makes your book better than them, a few sample chapters: 1-3 are usually the best, a complete table of contents with chapter outlines.. and complete means complete.

So lets tackle the most important part first, YOU. Yes, believe it or not YOU are the most important aspect of your work even though as a writer you don't feel that way. The brief biography is your chance to show creative writing skills and display talents. Did you win an elementary school competition in poetry? Mention it. Did you study writing in AP or college classes? Mention it! Whatever ties you to the art of the written word package it with your personality and jazz it up with your own wonderful angle. The better you sell yourself, the easier it will be to sell your work.

Now on to science, math, and a whole lot of technical blah blah blah. Lets start with the synopsis. Use one or two well crafted paragraphs to sum up your story and don't worry about reveling the surprise ending, that could be a major selling point you will miss out on if you don't mention it. So repeat with me now: MENTION IT! The estimated word count and completion date are for people who are published, if you aren't published then complete your manuscript and use your actual completion date and word count and let the editorial staff know that it is finished, that's a selling point.  

Step two, requires research in many fields. You need to find at least three, well selling books that are comparable competition to yours. Find out who buys them, how many are sold per annum, and what makes them sell. Plot, connection to real world events, good photos, all the juicy bits. Know them well. Now you know based on the competition who your audience is. Next compile your research into three professional and informative sections. 1. Your assessment and description of your target audience and why they will buy from you. Use that as a platform into speaking about the market for your product which is section 2. And that segways into section 3, the list of comparable titles and why your book is different and AMAZING. Remember highlight where they fall short and you have come behind to succeed.

Step three, end your proposal on a solid positive and professional note. Thank them for taking precious time to review your work and let them know you want to work with them, that's why you chose to contact them.

Step four, attach the COMPLETED table of contents and chapter outlines and first three chapters of your book.

Step five, rewrite it all.

Step six, edit and rewrite again

Step seven, have a knowledgeable writer and business person look it over.

Step eight, follow their feedback and rewrite

Step nine, make sure every last letter and punctuation mark is perfect and properly placed. Then and ONLY then should you send off your proposal via email or snail mail however they require.

Remember each organization has different requirements. Follow their guidelines and use mine as a filler if you see something that is useful that they might have left to your discretion.

If you would like any help or tips please comment below and I would be happy to assist in anyway I can. It is my person philosophy that competition is healthy and a good writer is a good writer even if that means I sell less. I would love to help you promote your work of art as being competitive in a tight and brutal market. I want all who have a desire to be a writer to see that dream realized and fulfilled.

Thanks for stopping by and stay classy!

Vera Lynn- "Realizing the impossible together." 

Heart Healthy Business

Often times we hear about how to make healthy food choices and exercise right so we can protect our hearts. A major problem here in America and around the world, heart disease affects millions and decreases your life span. Many people call it the silent killer, slowly choking your heart until a major event like atrial fibrillation. It can happen through body changes or it lies lurking in your DNA, taking advantage of circumstances like poor food intake and dehydration.

This is a deeply personal issue to me, it has cut short the lifespan of four of my relatives and leaves many more still closely monitored by medicines and doctor visits. As of this weekend, heart disease has struck another family member taking him and his pysicians by surprise.  That's why I would like to reach out to everyone and warn about the levels of your personal stress. Whether its a small business owner/partner or a writer, a single parent or a student...everyone has to worry about something. It's human nature. 

There are many things to do about stress, check out my older post called Funny Business, dealing with ways to be creative and stress less. Finding things to do about stress is how you manage it, but you have to know about stress to treat it. Women tend to recognize they are stressed waaaaaay before men do. (That's not just my opinion btw) That is, I am sure, at least a small contributing factor as to why men struggle with heart disease more than women. That doean't leave women off the hook, we all have to watch out for stress.

Running a heart healthy small business practice is the best way to ensure you can minimize stress for you. Heart healthy business should be mindful of many stressors including:

1. Admit you have stress (everyone experiences stress, even Jesus, so don't try and tell me you're good or ok!)  Identify what punches your buttons and deal with managing that first.

2. Overworking- if you work for "the man" you have a time card. Don't be chained to a format, but if you're putting in lots of overtime, find a way to give yourself a real break. Make time for it!

3. You're in charge- being "the man" is a great stress relief, but it comes with the burden of well, being in charge. You are the person who gets the credit and the accountability. It's tough how to treat this type of stress, but my best advice is talk to other business savy individuals. This small business community on google + is great. Ask advice, so if in the sad event you experience disappointment, you won't experience regret. You will know that the best informed choice was made at the time.

4. Connectivity- staying constantly connected to the world of your business is stressful on you and your family. If a date, vacation, or meal is on the table don't talk about business or engross yourself in your mobile devices. Disconnect and increase your endorphins (which lower stress) by enjoying special time with special people.

5. Deadlines- as the big cheese you can set and expand your expectations at will. Don't add stress to you business and your life by letting you expectations run wild. Learn to manage your deadlines, priorities and expectations.

These are just my thoughts and my ideas that I have seen work for friends, family, and myself. Don't end up on the "overly stressed and under medicated" list. If you can manage your stress you are one step closer to a healthy heart and a happier you.

This does not replace talking to your PCP and getting screened for heart disease and other heart related issues. Know where you stand and move forward informed. 

A Picture is Worth 1000 Words

I was looking for an inspirational picture and this is what I first saw...I am NOT sure how I feel about this, but I know I am not inspired. Hehe *looks over shoulder nervously*

Let It Go- How to take a break and still be productive

Most of you might be wondering- where the heck has Vera been? (I am left wondering the same thing too sometimes) Ok, so here is the low down: I started a class at Brown, had the flu, and made a pretty decent costume. Ok the flu does not count.
The truth is I was swamped with worries, plagued with doubts, and just felt overwhelmed. So I decided to take a break from the business so to speak. I started taking classes from Brown, worked at a BigFoot Military Tires to get a work out, and I took on a commission as a semi-professional seamstress to make a homecoming character gown for the lovely and beautiful Alexis Gilbert.

The whole project of sewing really got me thinking: if I needed a break and didn't do anything productive...what would be the point in taking a break? Small business owners know what I mean. If you don't work, you don't get paid, you don't expand, and you don't get advertised.
It's really tough building a company and your reputation...but it's not unlike building a costume.

1. Visualize you customer basis and the strengths of this basis.

My client was Alexis Gilbert. She loves Frozen, Disney movies in general, has a fun and proud personality. A marvelous dancer and a total smarty pants.

2. Plan what you can offer you client. (In this case I was hired as a spur of the moment but it works just as well) Alexis knew I had made several costumes in the past and had something very specific in mind for her homecoming character.

3.a Understand the client's wishes and know if you can provide excellent service. I had the experience and confidence to make a wonderful costume, however; I would have never dreamed of making a wedding dress, that I would have passed on to another person I know. I knew my limits and strengths.
                  3.b (Know the budget and financial breakdown of your client so that you can always meet their financial and mental expectations, and in finances always go for under budget when possible. Your client is top priority and so are their funds.)

4. Next brain storm and project plan. Know how to personalize your business for you passionate client base. In my costume plan I wanted something that reflected Alexis in every possible aspect. Elegant, graceful, and 'go big or go home' attitude. So I made my list and went shopping (fabrics, thread, contracts fabric, glitter, zippers, bling, and pizzazz) I also considered even the eye color and skin tone of my client when selecting colors of the fabric, no aspect of the client is too superfluous.

(The beginnings of the order)

 

 5. Start from the bottom up. Much like a business a costume has basic pieces it needs and you can solidify a good reputation and plan if you get the basics down first. You cant have a princess dress without a skirt ;)

(Basis skirt model)

6. Step back and reinvent the idea of your project to better streamline the process. I altered the pattern in seven key places because I knew my client and I had wanted excellence (as much as I could)

 

(End of week 1)

7. Quality trumps QUANTITY! Especially in the small business world you have to prove you are different and the quality (not quantity) will prove that to your client. Not only had Alexis already shopped around for a costume, she was not impressed with the price and quality of the gowns. Quality is what brings customers your way. Knowing this I tailored the dress to fit her athletic tastes and bought the performance fabrics for durability, sheen, and feel.

(Photo I sent to Alexis to get approval on the train)

8. Always keep the client up to date on advancements, changes, and further ideas...seriously that's a no brainer. It makes and keeps your business human. Never automate and be a personal as possible. (I added embellishments whenever possible to give regal elegance to the costume but not to over do it and make it itchy or impractical)

 

9. Fit the product to your client and make sure all is well. I had two minor things that I needed to do before the final turn over. Hem and trim the dress per her shoe selection, and add the final touch to the collar. Honestly it was a simple process and I gave the materials for embellishments to her in case she made a last minute choice. Check and double check before you turn the product over. Your name and your reputation are contained within each project. Make it shine.

 

And boy oh boy did it shine! I was so pleased to see this mornings pictures and look forward to many more.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Remember, if its a costume or business, simple, smart steps that are all customer focused will get you further than any amount of convention.

 

Be YOUnique!!!

 

Props to Andrew of A&L Adventures Inc for the gorgeous photos before class at oh dark thirty this morning. He took plenty more and the special effects are beautiful. If you ever need professional, well priced photography with an amazing turnaround you should look his company up. Just another small business trying to make it by.

 

 

 

 

 

Nice Vice

Ever thought about what you're top vice is? I've so many, I lost count years ago. Not to brag, but suffering from chronic perfectionism, OCD (CDO for those of us who understand), mega artist complex, and anxiety they can't live without me. They define that person I like to call my evil twin, and if I stopped feeding them, I wouldn't have an evil twin.
A long time ago someone told me that weaknesses were strengths overdone...well I that didn't help this monstrous ego I am saddle with because out came the snob. "Hahaha so really you're telling me I am too good at everything." (evil monologue laugh.)

(courtesy of google images)

Ok, so that got me thinking and being sick recently has helped me calmly formulate an idea for a post. All writers are artists, and even business persons have a unique creative intellect. We are a special kind of OCD (boy, it hurts to even write that) and have a huge chip on our shoulders. We all have vices, and some of the best ways to change said habits are to realize we have them in the first place. They do affect us negatively, and it is something we can change...so why hide it anymore? Believe me, often times the last person to know about the vice is the person who has it. You won't surprise anyone but yourself with this introspective assignment. 
In an effort to ameliorate our imprisoned souls from the stigma that all artists/business persons are stuck up, I propose we allow a moment of honesty pierce through our ever creative worlds and think of our vice that we most often struggle with. I am actually collecting and making a scrapbook of the neatest takes on vices, so to kick of this new honesty fest here it goes...

Prime Vice: MY OPINIONS
I have the worst, and most embarrassing habit of assuming everyone is entitled to my opinions and not their own. Technically they aren't facts so I shouldn't be so full of myself. No matter how much truth I have use to levy off any rivers of doubt regarding my heavily fortified opinion, that doesn't mean that one day the rivers might swell and overwhelm the dam. I need to become a more appreciative of people's opinions. (Note: this is NOT including morals- we all know what's wrong and no matter the excuses just because you don't like it doesn't make a moral issue an issue of opinion.)

(courtesy of google images)

 

My goal is train my spirit into the ultimate sai-keirei- so far I meet everyone disrespectfully face to face...FAIL